Posted by: itstails | December 16, 2008

Gay Penguins, Crime, Passion, Family, Zoo Keepers, What More Could You Want?!

What would you think if you saw this penguin waddling along?  Would you think ‘Oh, what a cute little pengiun waddling along!’ or ‘What is a penguin doing in the middle of Manhattan?’ or would you, like Chinese zookeepers, think ‘Get that gay penguin out of here!’ 

Yes, now if you’re gay you’re not just discriminated against if you’re human, but also a penguin, “A pair of gay penguins (were) thrown out of their zoo colony for repeatedly stealing eggs.”  Don’t let Pat Buchanan read this story.  Gay penguins stealing eggs?!  I think we can solve all of our missing children cases in the US now – round up the gays!  Thank you gay penguins for showing us the light.

How did these birds go about their theft?  “Last month the birds were segregated after they were caught  placing stones at the feet of parents before waddling away with their eggs.”  Wow, these birds are like the gay Butch Cassidy and Sundance Kid of penguins.  I think the replacing eggs with stones trick is smarter than about half the crimes human theives attempt.   

However, activists fought the case and now “(The zoo) decided to give them two eggs from another couple whose hatching ability had been poor and they’ve turned out to be the best parents in the whole zoo.”  Yes, reports are that the gay penguins have decorated the eggs rooms in a decadent mauve and have all the latest fashionable baby penguin clothes already picked out.

This story is Good News for:

1. Gay Humans – Sorry about Prop 8, but we did get some gay penguins some eggs of their own if that helps!

2. Penguins – Hey, I think penguins are now officially more progressive than the human species.

Anyone else Good News for?  Leave it.

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